Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Meet The Fanatically Avowed Non-Readers: Part 1
"Psycho Schoolmarm" is the wife of my (marginally) estranged bass player and is also my diabolically obsessed arch-nemesis.
(She is clearly the favorite among my sworn enemies)
Sarcasm, planning and directing Themed Formals, bass players, travel, square roots and stuff, talking and talking and talking, ridiculously elaborate frou-frou cocktails, providing stream-of-consiousness voice-over narration to televised mid-level Beauty Pageants, "Meet The Press", gaudy disco-era footwear, preparing "chili" with caustic/explosive qualities, thinkin' about Lance Armstrong, collecting suggestive art, avoiding first-rate on-line entertainment, "flame-spamming" my core readership with vitriolic rants, berry picking and griping.
Being soundly whipped at Trivial Pursuit by her intellectual betters, aging lothario acoustic folksingers, being pressed into bread-slicing duty at gala social events, neo-conservatism and handsome charismatic bloggers.
An interesting note: She'll have quite a dilemma when she objects to this post, as that will require her to admit she's read it.
She'd rather eat nails.